unclemike666:
“   why waterboard a prisoner of war when you can r@pe?
”
and there it is

unclemike666:

why waterboard a prisoner of war when you can r@pe?

and there it is

beyondthevalleyofthefemdoms:
“   freyasfancy:
“   It’s like I say…cocks don’t lie, do they?
”
I’ve decided I’m going to start using a new tag. #In The Valley will be used to criticize images that have harmful messages that are commonly found in BDSM...

beyondthevalleyofthefemdoms:

freyasfancy:

It’s like I say…cocks don’t lie, do they?

I’ve decided I’m going to start using a new tag. #In The Valley will be used to criticize images that have harmful messages that are commonly found in BDSM culture. I’ll also use appropriate trigger warnings so people can use Tumblr Savior to avoid things that might be particularly harmful to them on an individual level. Other people are welcome to use the #In the Valley tag for their own criticism.

This particular rant isn’t about female dominants, but it is about an idea that seems to proliferate in heterosexual femdom culture. That idea is that if a cis man (or person of other gender with external genitalia, but usually a cis man) is hard, that equals some kind of expression of desire or consent.

Not only is this idea not true, but it can lead to rape and sexual assault of cis male submissives and bottoms, or submissives and bottoms who have external genitalia in general (although in my experience, queer culture seems more aware of the fact that engorged external genitalia ≠ consent).

The only way to know if someone wants to do a certain thing is if they explicitly say, “yes, I want to do this thing.” People with external genitalia can get erections for an assortment of reasons, some of which don’t involve being turned on. And even if someone IS hard because they’re turned on, that doesn’t mean that they feel OK about doing a particular thing. People can get turned on by things they find triggering, for example. And if you’re a good person, you don’t want to trigger your partner (exception: there are some kinds of edge play that involve consensual triggering. However, that kind of play also needs to be EXPLICITLY NEGOTIATED AND CONSENSUAL in order to be ethical).


Listen to what your submissives, bottoms, and partners of other stripes say with their mouths, if you don’t want to be a rapist. I don’t think I can be any clearer than that.

Thank you.

Not only can it lead to sexual assault, it’s one of the biggest things that keeps penis-owning assault victims from reporting after the fact, because they’re not taken seriously. Which leads to more assault. And so on. Rape culture, you might have heard about it.

It may be a hot thing for you to think about, and that’s fine. But you must recognize that at that point you’re fantasizing. As in, fantasy. As in, alternate universe. As in, not reality. It’s like… it’s the difference between fantasizing about Femdom Island or Gor or whatever, and actually believing that subs have no rights.


#male rape myths
#the Pirate Problem